I Was Told “B**CH Sit Down” At Work

I know what you are thinking. No, I’m not referring to Kendrick Lamar’s song ‘Humble’. However, a simple debate on why ‘no-nonsense women’ are sometimes referred to as ‘b**ches’ at work, definitely led to a male colleague telling me to ‘sit my a*** down’.

For some reason, I always engage myself in these type of conversations. I just can’t help it. I’m not afraid to voice my opinion. If I believe in something and I have an opinion about it, why should I keep quiet? Nevertheless, I realise that this is what happens to a lot of ambitious young women not only in the workplace but also in society. Everyone can be voicing their opinion, but girls are told to sit down and just be quiet. Especially, if we portray any (assertive) behaviour that’s not people’s perception of how we are supposed to be/behave. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not encouraging any rude behaviour.

For example, I was told “b**ch sit down” not because I disrespected anyone or said it first.

I was told to sit down because I had a strong will and opinion which was not conforming to the box that people wanted to place me in. And I believe that this is one of the many challenges not only millennials but women (in especially male-dominated work environments) face today. It’s like we literally have to strive to be taken seriously. Reacting to any belittling comments is often brushed off as “Oh it was just a joke” or “Why are you so sensitive?”.

“When pursuing the things you’re passionate about people will tell you to sit down”.

You must be wondering, was I offended?

I personally don’t think it’s alright or professional to refer to anyone by the B-word in the workplace. However, I was even more concerned about being told to sit down just because I had an opinion. So did I sit down? “definitely not” (at least not when I was told to). And that for me was a personal moment of victory. It’s like a lightbulb went off in my head. And I suddenly realised that in life, when pursuing the things you’re passionate about when having an opinion and when you’re trying to positively change the things around you, people will tell you to SIT DOWN.

  • You are too ambitious “sit down”
  • You can’t be a boss and a good mother “sit down”
  • You can’t get married and have successful career “sit down”
  • You can’t start your own business “sit down”
  • You don’t have the experience “sit down”
  • You are not being realistic “sit down”
  • You are too opinionated “sit down”
  • You can’t write that book “sit down”
  • You are not capable of doing the job “sit down”
  • You don’t know what you’re talking about “sit down”

But hey, you have to realise that you’re on a mission here. People telling you ‘b**ch sit down’ has nothing to with you but everything to do with how your opinion, ambition and drive makes them feel about themselves.

It’s funny how someone tried to make me feel bad for starting a blog that encourages young women to be ambitious and inspire others. What is truly bad about that? Even if I can just help and inspire one single person, I will NOT allow anyone to convince me to SIT DOWN.

Experienced something similar? Feel free to drop your opinion in the comment box below or submit your story here.

Sarah Johnson

Sarah is Founder and Editor of IAMICareer. She currently holds a BA of Commerce and has a strong background in Marketing. Sarah is passionate about seeing millennials thrive in career and the workplace and is dedicated to helping millennial women bridge the gap between university and the corporate world.

  • malena chambers

    Actually I do understand what you’re saying I have work certain jobs where I truly knew and believe that I knew and understood the occupation that I was in and I came in the door with the understanding that I can do this so to my understanding I was somewhat the bigger person and very opinionated then I had someone come up to me and say you can’t learn and be opinionated at the same time you only can be one or the other but if you going to be one or the other then you have to at least know what you’re doing the correct way at that point I’ve been sat down and said to myself it’s time to take a seat it’s time to learn another lesson and that’s what I did learned another lesson the thing about life that I enjoy is that I never have a problem admitting when I’m wrong I never have a problem saying I’m sorry and I never have a problem with asking for help yes sometimes I can get up on my heels for the most part I really do try to stay humble but I believe that everyday you should learn something everyday should be a presented topic in life that you should have mine before you go to sleep you should be able to say to yourself what did I learn today what did I get out of today what is it that I don’t want to repeat again today sometimes it’s challenging but it’s good to do it reinforces a lot but at the same time it makes you a better person in the long run and then sometimes you just got to fake it until you make it we all are human we all are going to make them steaks nobody is perfect at all so I know I kind of just went over and Beyond on that question.

    • Sarah Johnson

      Hi Malena, Thanks for your comment and for sharing your take on this. I completely get what you’re saying. Sometimes you just need to keep quiet and observe in order to learn.

      The point that I’m trying to bring across with this post is that if the setting is such that everyone is expected to voice their opinion, you have the right to do so too. However, that does not been that you have to be rude or disrespectful about it. I mean, no one should go and fight the people at their office. Also, you can’t force your opinion on anyone. I mention in this post that I was told to ‘sit down’ not because I was disrespectful, but just because I simply had an opinion.

      Nevertheless, it’s still very important to know and discern WHEN it’s the right time to voice that opinion. This is something I myself am still learning. You don’t have to say what you think ALL the time. And most importantly, even if someone doesn’t believe in what you’re capable of that’s just their opinion. But don’t let what they think discourage you from following your dreams and becoming a better person.

  • malena chambers

    Good morning Sarah I really appreciate the different ways that you deliver informative information for your readers. I wanted to know how do you go about finding that type of Mich of knowing exactly what your readers are looking for? And also how do you know how much to give as far as information but then how to pull back because at times I know that I can keep going like the Energizer and before I know it I might have ran a 5K. They have more questions but I’ll stop here because I don’t want to keep asking asking thank you for your time